My Stages of Grief of Another Trump Presidency

A divided image of the US capitol with red on one side and blue on the other, and groups of angry sad people opposing each other, to represent the 2024 election.

Denial

I submitted my vote by mail ballot over a week ahead of time at the local ballot box, hoping maybe we could have the first woman president this time, since apparently the last female candidate didn’t quite cut it. Some representation would be nice, but alas, as I finally began checking the results Tuesday evening, it became apparent that no matter how qualified a woman is, no matter how great of a leader she has demonstrated herself to be, the bar is just too high.

“He can be lawless, but she has to be flawless.”

My country would rather elect a felon with a pile of sexual assault accusations and a history of racist, sexist, xenophobic and divisive behavior and rhetoric than an extremely well qualified and experienced woman of color. Or, more accurately, they’d rather just sit this one out and let their apathy usher in literal fascism.

I feel betrayed. I want it to not be true. We can’t sell ourselves out AGAIN, can we?! Surely we learned something since last time!? Nope.

Anger

Wednesday morning I am up early and on a shuttle to SFO to catch a flight to Baltimore to visit my partner Wesley. I definitely slept like shit, and have been the entire week leading up to the election. My body knew.

I received a text message from a number I didn’t recognize (202.217.8926 if anyone is curious to do some sleuthing) with a video of Trump’s smirking face winking, and the caption “🇺🇸 America will be great again!”

It feels like a punch to the gut. I resist the urge to reply to whoever is mocking my pain via gloating text message and try to sleep. I can’t help but take politics personally when the candidate that stacked the Supreme Court with right wing loyalists who overturned Roe v Wade and ushered in a new era of corruption and anti-democratic decisions, the one who’s assaulted many women because he thinks he can just “grab ’em by the pussy,” very obviously a malignant narcissist, triggers me on a personal level every time I hear his voice. I have been getting 2016 flashbacks, and so many of my nightmares from that time came true during his last term that I don’t know if I can handle another one. Trump reminds me of my abusive narcissistic ex, especially the way he talks down to people and manipulates with a carefully orchestrated facade of lies constructed to bolster his ego.

It’s not that I’m mad at the people who voted for him as much as his enablers, and the larger system of fascism and capitalism his movement represents. He takes advantage of people’s lack of education or survival instincts to convince them he can help them, and the Democrats sure could do a better job of actually speaking to the pain points of the people (what happened to being the party of the working class?) People really don’t like being told they are being duped, apparently even less so than falling victim to a con artist’s grift.

Narcissists are master manipulators. Unfortunately most of the people who have fallen for his bullshit won’t find out until it’s too late and he’s coming for their rights too. He considers the “radical left lunatics” the “enemy within” and blames all of our problems on already vulnerable populations like immigrants and trans folks.

He’s a bully. And it INFURIATES me that he’s managed to scam his way back into the system, riding on his privilege. I don’t know if this stage will be ending any time soon…

Bargaining

Maybe he won’t fulfill the promises he made to deport millions of immigrants. Maybe we’ll still get legal weed, even though it does not seem like a priority especially with JD Vance around. Maybe he’ll… wait, he appointed Elon Musk to WHAT NOW?! Great, a cabinet full of quacks, grifters and sex offenders, an anti-vaxxer in charge of healthcare policy, and I’m sure his kids will all have nice cushy appointments… Republicans have control of all three branches of government and both bodies of Congress.

This is dire. This feels helpless.

What went wrong? Let’s overthink on all the things the Harris campaign could have done better, wish that Biden could have just realized he was too damn old before the primaries, overanalyze the voter demographics, or search for signs of scandal (Elon was definitely up to some shady shit)… Unfortunately none of that will actually change anything and might induce headaches.

Oh great. My watch informs me that my resting heart rate is almost 10 beats per minute higher than normal in the last week (looks at calendar, it’s been a week since the election).

I respond to my Doctor’s messages and decide to try a steady dose of hormones via low dose birth control, which could help manage my awful periods and possible endometriosis symptoms. Despite my hesitation about hormonal birth control, I decide to go forward with getting the prescription. I tell my doctor I’m scared access to birth control will change in the near future so I’d like to stock up; he agrees and gets prescription submitted to the pharmacy. That will be $0 thanks to the ACA requiring insurers to cover birth control. Thanks Obama.

Depression

Seeing news about his cabinet appointments is both laughable and depressing. Fox News pundits, rich donors / unwavering supporters, and dudes with a history of sexual assault accusations seem to be the common theme. He’s being called out on making promises like lowering the costs of groceries and tariffs being a good idea. The lies are being exposed but nobody cares. Nothing happens.

Trump and his disrespect for any sort of institution, like democracy for instance, is sadly a big part of the draw. And I get it. From the perspective of a lot of this country, “the government” – however they may define it – is the bad guy. Out to get them and not to be trusted. Unfortunately this is not the greatest for things like public health, access to essential services, and voter turnout.

And they are right – in a lot of ways, our government and its rigid two-party system has failed the American people at large. Its priorities are upside down and nothing is “trickling down” – the divide is only growing.

But so is class consciousness… Cue Luigi: “Deny. Depose. Defer.” long enough and the apathy, the depression and the anger simmers into rage and sometimes into action.

I used to be a pacifist. But I think reality got too dark, too real and too awful for me to truly take any type of revolution off the table. Sometimes the only language a violent and harmful system understands is violence and fear. We might as well make CEOs afraid again.

Acceptance

Glimmers of hope like seeing the solidarity of support around “The Adjuster” aka United Healthcare CEO murderer inspire some deep discussions in my online communities has helped bring me around from the dumps into a place of focusing on how to move forward.

Seeing Amazon and Starbucks workers unite in striking during the busy and overly consumption focused holiday season actually sparks some joy in my little socialist heart. I want us all to win, and that’s why this election feels like such a deep loss. A loss to the people, to the working class, the oppressed and those facing atrocities like war or systemic violence like poverty or lack of access to necessary healthcare… This is a brutal loss for women, for democracy, for queer and trans folks and for the strength of our communities, our infrastructure and our democratic process.

Hold fast. Take care of each other. My goals for the new year are focused on fortifying myself and my immediate community, helping those who are vulnerable, stocking up on essential items that may become harder to come by (abortion medication, birth control, hormone therapy, etc), and building solidarity and community locally and online in everything I do.

We must all keep fighting in our own way. Find ways to volunteer in your local community, donate to local food banks and non-profits, get vocal in support of vital institutions like the US Postal Service and the Affordable Care Act. Pressure your elected officials and stay informed. But mostly to start small by taking care of yourself and those around you. You cannot pour from an empty cup, a lesson that I have always had a hard time learning!

As the holidays help lift my spirits and the gratitude I have for my family, my loved ones and my life starts to come back into focus, the waves of anger and sadness subside and I channel that energy into the fight ahead.

Please stay in touch with ways you are staying active in your community and causes that need attention and support. And whether you are celebrating or having a hard time this holiday season, my heart goes out to you. Take care, stay cozy, and keep your heart in it.

Cannabis Tourism & Hospitality: A Path to Sustaining Legacy Cannabis in California (And Sustaining ME in 2024!)

I am grateful that I have the privilege to always land on my feet in my career, despite choosing difficult paths. I have skills to fall back on, an amazing family who is always willing to help me out when I need it, and a vast network of talented people who I’ve been lucky to cross paths with in my unconventional career path. And after months of applying for Marketing jobs across a variety of sectors and seeking out new full time positions in a struggling cannabis industry, I can happily report that I have landed back on my feet.

I get by with a little help from my friends. And instead of settling on a full time job that wasn’t coming to fruition, in a matter of months I have decided to instead focus on finding freelance contract work, and filled my plate with a variety of projects that are fulfilling, interesting, and hopefully lucrative. All with people who were already in my circle and realm of experience.

I have a couple of small social media marketing projects with local friends that have helped fill in the gaps the past few months – shout out to Sara at Akasha, my microdosing coach client of several years, and Patrick at Malarkey / MayDay and Juke Joint, a musician, DJ, event producer and talent booker at some of my favorite local venues. (Please follow them & give them some love). Santa Rosa dispensary Doobie Nights is still a client of mine for e-commerce, graphic design and email/text communications. And very soon I’ll be working on social media for The Emerald Cup which is a perfect intersection of my events and cannabis experience.

But what I am most excited about as I plan out my 2024 calendar is working with my former colleague at The Hybrid Creative, Brian Applegarth, in managing operations and marketing for his consulting work in the connection of tourism and cannabis. Brian knows more about weed culture and history than almost anyone I know. He’s also a prolific traveler and an expert in hospitality and destination marketing, specializing in speaking to the cannabis travel audience. As I found out back in the Hybrid days, he’s a lot of fun (and like, way too good) at karaoke.

Along with my former boss at Hybrid, Zack Darling, we are building a 2024 campaign promoting The Cannabis Trail along with destination marketing clients in Mendocino County, Humboldt County and the City of Oakland.

We’ll be working with a number of legacy and equity farms, cannabis brands and dispensaries, media and data partners, and cannabis industry associations to highlight cannabis culture’s historical landmarks and pioneers, promote cool weed related tourist destinations along The Cannabis Trail, and create content that highlights travel experiences that cannabis naturally enhances – anything involving food, art, and nature.

Travel, nature, art, food, events & experiences, AND WEED?!? Um… those are only all of my favorite things basically. Instantly IN.

But even more exciting is the potential that approaching cannabis from a lens of experiences enhanced by it – travel, exploring nature, eating amazing local food, etc. opens up more possibilities for engaging an industry that is struggling to survive due to overtaxation, difficult to navigate regulations, and competition with unregulated industries like hemp-derived CBD or the illicit cannabis market.

By collaborating with the hospitality, travel and destination marketing communities, Applegarth Consultative Services is able to connect their resources with industry operators like legacy farms, locally owned dispensaries, unique lounges and experiential offerings, and advocacy organizations. All aligning to legitimize the industry and educate the cannabis travel consumer, a growing market.

The history of medical cannabis legalization movement in San Francisco in the 90s and its intersections with the gay rights movement during the AIDS crisis is a rich cultural story that is worth educating about. The back to the land movement and those inspired by them to pioneer regenerative cannabis agriculture in Northern California have so many stories to tell, and this project is an opportunity to educate about and amplify and weave together all these unique cultural stories from the local cannabis community.

So in the new year working on this campaign, we will be highlighting local cannabis culture as something unique to Northern California that can only be truly experienced here. By connecting these historical stories with local, legacy / equity cannabis businesses as well as nearby hotels, restaurants, and attractions mapped along The Cannabis Trail and pairing cannabis effects with unique experiences in Oakland, Mendo and Humboldt, we’ll establish Northern California as a destination for anyone interested in cannabis.

Patient access to medical cannabis began in my little corner of Northern California, and landmarks in that movement along with stops in the traditional outdoor growing communities a bit further north in the Emerald Triangle are highlighted on The Cannabis Trail, which spans from Trinity County down to Santa Cruz.

Next year’s campaign, as well as working with several of Brian’s other destination, tourism and cannabis clients, is just the beginning. I can see this type of work supporting and rekindling the struggling cannabis industry. It’s been a rough last few years, and until something changes on the federal level, cannabis operators will have to grow their own market, collaborate with other industries, and explore new ways to bring in enough revenue to survive.

Sonoma Hills Farm in Petaluma, my favorite local farm to visit for events
The beautiful cannabis garden at Sonoma Hills Farm in October 2023 – SHF really does cannabis hospitality right and I always love visiting their farm for events.

I’ve gotten to experience some really amazing events, farm visits, unique dispensaries and lounge spaces, industry conferences and parties working in the cannabis industry. I’ve even produced and planned a few of those events. I’ve met so many people across the community who have stories to tell, helpful information to teach, and challenges they are always overcoming. Why not connect the travel and hospitality industries to my cannabis community and offer them a new way to collaborate and thrive together?

I truly believe that collaborating with the robust travel and hospitality industries, and focusing on cannabis effects pairing experiences and all the activities that cannabis can help enhance can be an avenue to preserving the unique legacy of California’s cannabis community. It’s something that the California cannabis industry can hang their hat on that no other market in the world can compare to. Because medical cannabis access began here, and it is the epicenter of cannabis culture and a trendsetter for the American experience with the plant. It’s high time we leverage that story in support of the small legacy farms and struggling cannabis businesses in our community.

I love it when a good team comes together for a worthy purpose. I also love it when my work life overlaps with my passions and interests, so I can do what I love and actually sustain myself and build a future. The recent projects I’ve thankfully acquired connect all the dots and I am so grateful.

This year has flown by. It’s been a roller coaster. But I’m looking forward to 2024 now with new areas to focus my energy and reasons to hope. And I’m also looking forward to wrapping up 2023 with family for the holidays.

Happy Holidays everyone! And here’s to a 2024 full of abundance, collaboration and community. We could all use it!

Winter is Coming – Brace Yourselves with Fire Cider

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Brrrr! Even on the mild Northern California coast, the chill of autumn is in the air. The rain has begun (thank goodness!) and the holidays are upon us. With so much happening, no one has time to get sick. Thankfully, there are plenty of ways to support your immune system as the weather shifts and the sun wanes. My favorite is by making FIRE CIDER!

I was introduced to this magical herbal concoction when I lived on the Mendocino Coast, from my beloved fermented foods swap group, Coastal Culture and Abundance, though it is not actually a ferment, it’s an infusion in vinegar. Fire Cider is a traditional herbal remedy that has been made and shared by many herbalists for decades to help boost the immune system, fight inflammation and infection, and warm the body from the inside. Recently, a company tried to trademark the name Fire Cider, effectively attempting to “own” a generic herbal remedy and prevent others from using this generic name for their versions of it, even though it was being made and shared by herbalists long before their attempt to lay claim to it. Herbalists responded by boycotting the company, Shire City Herbals, and continuing to spread information about it so that people could make fire cider themselves and keep this lovely tradition alive!

From FreeFireCider.com, a group of herbalists working together with herbalist Rosemary Gladstar, who coined the phrase “fire cider” and started sharing the recipe over 25 years ago,  to protect the name Fire Cider from trademarks. They are committed to providing information and materials for the herbal community so that together, we can fight to keep traditional remedies free and available to everyone:

The remedy is used to help warm up the body, and generally acts a stimulant and antimicrobial used during cold and flu season.  Recently, a large company decided to trademark the name and is forcing small businesses who have made and sold it to change their product names.  Some of the companies and individuals in question have made and sold this remedy for many years longer than the company that trademarked it has even existed.  Many people feel this is a dangerous precedent to anyone who creates and shares recipes anywhere on the web or in books and this led to a filing with the US Patent and Trademark Office asking that the mark be deemed generic.  Until the company agrees to freeing Fire Cider from trademark restriction, a boycott of their product has been launched.

Fire Cider

Every fall, our Coastal Culture and Abundance group got together to make fire cider, each bringing some ingredients to share and an empty jar to take our fire cider home in, and we gathered again last week to make new batches for the coming winter.

Making fire cider has become a fun autumn tradition for me, and it’s a great excuse to get together, so I highly recommend making fire cider with friends and sharing the bounty! During Covid I even did a fire cider making Zoom with a few friends. All that chopping and packing jars can get tedious so it’s nice to have company!

You’ll find countless versions of this recipe online, but the basic recipe includes onions, hot peppers, ginger, turmeric, garlic, horseradish, citrus fruit, rosemary, apple cider vinegar, and honey. I like to add a variety of other beneficial ingredients like black peppercorns (to help activate the turmeric), oregano, burdock root, radishes, rose hips if I can find them, any other fresh herbs I have on hand, and plenty of different varieties of citrus and peppers. I usually skip the honey or add it later, after the fire cider has had a chance to infuse.

Fire Cider recipe from freefirecider.com

How to Make Your Own Fire Cider

Gather as many of these ingredients as you can, preferably organic. No need to peel anything but be sure everything is clean.

  • ~1/2 cup fresh ginger root (grated or chopped)
  • ~1/2 cup fresh horseradish root (grated or roughly chopped)
  • ~1/4 cup fresh turmeric root, or a couple Tbsp turmeric powder
  • 1-2 onions, chopped (I like to use multiple colors)
  • 10-12 cloves of garlic (I just remove the outer layers and separate the cloves, no need to peel them completely)
  • a few hot peppers of various varieties, chopped
  • 2 or more citrus fruits, cut into rounds (lemon, orange, lime, grapefruit are all excellent additions)
  • a few sprigs each of fresh herbs like rosemary, oregano, parsley and cilantro
  • 1 Tbsp or so of whole peppercorns
  • ~1/8 cup or so of fresh burdock root
  • A few slices of turnip, radish, or daikon, if desired
  • raw unfiltered apple cider vinegar

Chop or grate all ingredients into small pieces. Grab a large jar – quart or half gallon size, depending on how many ingredients you have, and fill it up with ingredients. It helps to add a little of each ingredient at a time to create pretty layers in the jar. If you find that you are having to pack ingredients in tightly to fit them, I recommend moving everything into a larger jar or starting a second one, because you’ll want plenty of space for the vinegar.

Once your jar is full of colorful ingredients, fill it with apple cider vinegar. Using a plastic lid or a layer of wax paper under the metal lid to prevent corrosion, cap the jar and let it sit out at room temperature for at least 4 weeks, preferably in a cool, dark place like a cupboard. Turn the jar over or give it a good shake every few days or whenever you remember to, letting all the goodness infuse into the vinegar.

Once it’s sat for at least a month (no harm in letting it infuse longer if you like), strain the liquid into a jar and keep it in the fridge. The solids can be composted or if you’d rather not waste them, I dry them in a food dehydrator for a day or so, then grind them all up in a coffee grinder and use it as a spice blend. If you like, you can add about 1/4 cup raw honey to the liquid to make it a bit more palatable, but I don’t really mind the taste, so I leave it out.

Now that you’ve made this lovely concoction, how do you use it? It can be taken by the spoonful or in a shot glass as a healing tonic whenever you feel a cold coming on, either on its own or mixed into hot water, honey and lemon. You can take it regularly as a preventative measure during the colder months as well. I add some to my homemade salad dressings, and you can also use it as a marinade or add it to any recipes that could benefit from a little kick. Basically, anything you’d use vinegar for, you can use fire cider for, and it will add a bit of spice and all kinds of immune boosting benefits.

Fire Cider is easy and fun to make, and it adds a gorgeous festive touch to your countertops while it steeps. And it’s especially fun to make with friends, so gather your tribe and make a party out of it!

How do you use fire cider? Do you add any special ingredients not listed above? Please share your tips in the comments!

Seeking New Career Adventures

Me at Lucidity Festival 2023

Wow, it’s been a while. So much has happened since my last update – a global pandemic, starting a job at local cannabis dispensary Doobie Nights after being laid off, exploring my newly discovered polyamorous-ness and developing two amazing relationships, becoming an auntie to my sister’s adorable kiddo Nico, adopting two kitties Mochi and Boba, many fun adventures, and riding the waves of the tumultuous cannabis and events industries. Definitely all worth their own blog post(s)!

What has prompted this long overdue update is that I’m in the market for a new job, and/or freelance projects, so it’s time to stop neglecting my own business in favor of working on my clients’ / employer’s. After almost 4 years as Marketing Director at Doobie Nights, the struggling business (by no fault of their own really – California cannabis is rough) is making cuts, and, well, Marketing always seems to be the first to go (which is not usually a wise move, IMHO). My hours have been cut from full time to very very part time and I’m going back to how I began this role, as a contractor working mostly from home. Ok, maybe that last part is a wise move.

I joined the team at Doobie Nights just before they opened the store, while they were finishing building the unique experiential space. I slowly added more responsibilities to my role as a one person Marketing department over the years, adapting to the changing needs of the business and industry. I led brand and marketing strategy as well as all aspects of digital marketing, website and social media management, graphic design, customer retention and communications, PR and media, event planning, partner marketing, and eventually I supported with operations administration, sales, and nurturing vendor relationships as well. I’m really proud of the marketing strategies and systems that I created and refined, the campaigns and connections I built, and everything I contributed to the company that will serve them for years to come. But with increasing competition, high tax bills and a struggling industry, they eventually could not afford a full time Marketing manager and weren’t able to offer me much room for growth.

Doobie Nights printed materials I designed.

So, here I am on the job hunt again and a little uncertain about not only how I’m gonna pay rent next month, but whether it’s time for another industry switch. As I mentioned, the cannabis industry in California has been hard, mostly because it operates in a legal gray area – totally legal locally and in the state, and still a Schedule I illegal substance federally (while that’s up for review at the moment, DEscheduling is definitely what we need, not this REscheduling nonsense).

Which means that cannabis companies are allowed to exist in California, but we are very limited especially when it comes to advertising and banking options, we cannot sell anything outside of the state or ship our products, and we are strictly regulated and over taxed. The worst hurdle we have to deal with is 280-E, a federal tax code regulation that makes it impossible for businesses engaged in anything federally illegal to write off most business expenses (like Marketing or labor costs) like any other business can. Let’s just say the only people making actual money selling legal weed are the regulators collecting the taxes (at the city, state, AND federal levels, I might add).

Luckily I am always up for a challenge, and have actually been involved in this industry in a variety of ways (from medical patient to activist to trimmer to grower to distributor) since the legacy market days. I truly believe in the power of this plant that has transformed my life. It’s a big part of why I left Idaho for California – those greener pastures! So I know this niche pretty well and have worked in the legal industry since 2018. Our clients at The Hybrid Creative were usually in cannabis, and I have learned a ton being a one person Marketing Department at a dispensary in the heart of NorCal’s weed country.

With this niche experience I know I can be a huge asset to any company in the cannabis industry. Most of my professional experience is in this arena, or other smaller niches – events and non-profits – which all align wonderfully with who I am so it that I can do my best work promoting something I actually believe and specialize in. But this has definitely hurt my job prospects. I don’t have a lot of “traditional” or corporate experience – because I dislike mainstream corporate culture and I do not thrive in that environment. Even though my Marketing skills are universal and transferrable, a lot of my specific platform experience is not (cannabis requires its own proprietary software due to all the legal restrictions and need to connect with the METRC track and trace system). I’ve sent SO MANY applications to all kinds of mid to senior level marketing positions across a variety of industries and haven’t heard anything back from any of them, the only responses I’ve gotten from applications have been within the cannabis industry.

Luckily I have worked on projects for a variety of clients in my freelance career over the years – from personal trainers to nutrition coaches to festivals to fertilizer companies to CPG to community organizations, and I’ve picked up a bunch of new skills like project management, data analysis, video editing, social media management, marketing strategy, budgeting and coordinating a variety of teams. I’ve also learned platforms like Hubspot CRM, Google Business Suite, WordPress, Adobe Creative Suite, Google Analytics, Trello, Alpine IQ, Mailchimp, Asana, SEO, etc. I tend to pick up new tech platforms and skills pretty quickly, since I am what you might call a raging nerd.

I’m keeping my mind open about what’s next, but if I can summon my manifestation powers a bit, let’s imagine my “dream” career… Ideally I would like to be able to buy a small house in Sonoma County at some point soon, which is an extremely tall order with housing prices here, but I’m quite over the constantly increasing rent. So I really need to stack some coin, as they say. I am ideally looking for a remote or hybrid role that’s close to full time and flexible, and/or a few more ongoing freelance projects. But no matter what structure my next role or roles takes, my top priorities are feeling respected, appreciated, and fairly compensated for my work; flexibility and the ability to take my work with me when I travel and work mostly from home; and working for an organization I believe in. I have to believe in the company’s mission and offerings if I’m going to successfully market them, because authenticity is the only way, and that cannot be faked.

While the cannabis industry would be the best fit for my experience, I’m also open to branching out and trying something new. I know my skills, adaptability and quick learning would be a great fit for just about industry. Sonoma County has a lot of wineries, and as a regulated industry I think I’d be a great fit there. Or I’d really love to get back into non-profits and doing something that allows me to support a good cause or an organization that serves the community. My friends used to ask me how many animals I’d saved that day working for PETA (my first job out of college was a web designer there). Not that I could ever give a real numerical answer, but I miss knowing my work has a direct positive impact on society. Getting people high and providing relief is nice too, but addressing climate change is probably more pressing and impactful. Can I do both? I’m definitely a fan of “Yes, And” solutions, so let’s see!

I turned 40 this year. I definitely don’t feel middle aged, or ready for menopause at all, and I hope I don’t quite look my age despite all the gray hair (at least until I dye it some wild color again). My 30s were amazing and so full of healing, adventure, growth, discovery and friendship. I needed that after spending most of my 20s in an abusive relationship. I always was a late bloomer, but in the last decade I definitely have come into my own and I’m very proud of where I am now – mentally, professionally, emotionally and sometimes physically. I have built an amazing life for myself and I have a wonderful community, but the one thing missing is financial security and a career I can pour myself into.

One thing I have discovered about myself over the last few years is that I care WAY less about what people think of me – that’s their business, not mine – and I’m much less afraid to be myself, take up space, be heard, and most of all embrace my WEIRD than I used to be. Life is too short to let anyone else tell you how to be you or how to live, and society is pretty messed up so why should I force myself into its boxes? I wish I would have discovered this superpower back in my 20s and stood up for myself a LOT more, and in some areas I still struggle with advocating for myself (especially professionally). But I think I am finally hearing the feedback of my past employers and clients, as well as coworkers, partners, and anyone I have worked with and realizing and embodying my inner badass. I still believe in humility and putting in the work rather than talking a big talk without backing it up for sure. But this timid hesitancy to toot my own horn needs to end, NOW.

I am a badass. I have done a lot of hard work, contributed to the success of every team I have been a part of, learned a ton and met so many amazing people along the way. Even though I am constantly learning new things and trying to improve my skills, I am experienced and knowledgeable and I know what I’m doing. I am enough. And I am worth investing in.

Can I be a badass for your company? Can I support your team and help you reach your marketing goals? Can I add some creative spark to your marketing or some organization to your administrative systems?

If you’re hiring for mid to senior level marketing, creative, operations, or administration related roles that you think I’d be a good fit for, or have a freelance marketing project you’d like to discuss, hit me up! I’m open and ready for a challenge and some new horizons. Check out some of my past work and my resume, and if any of it resonates, let’s connect. Thanks for reading and sending any leads or projects my way!

How a Purpose-Driven Brand Does Pride

I wrote this article in June 2019 for the blog of The Hybrid Creative – read the original here. I learned a lot while writing this article and it’s worth sharing and preserving this work...


June brings summertime sunshine (or if you’re near the Bay Area, it can be more like June gloom), BBQs, and trips to the beach. And it also heralds the arrival of Pride parades, celebrations of diversity, and lots of rainbows adorning storefronts and social media accounts.

Cannabis and Pride actually share a common thread in the history of their movements. Gay rights activists were among the first to champion cannabis legalization when they discovered that it helped to alleviate complications caused by AIDS. In 1996, gay activist Dennis Peron co-authored a California law that dubbed him the “father of medical marijuana.” So it’s no surprise that cannabis brands are jumping on board to show support for the LGBTQIA+ community and add a splash of rainbow to their summer marketing campaigns.

But before painting your brand with the popular rainbow brush, dive deeper into your intentions, make sure your company’s actions align with the cause, educate yourself on the history and people of Pride, and invite your LGBTQIA+ team members to lead the planning process to ensure you’re truly aligning your actions with your words.

As our Brand Strategy clients know, it starts with WHYBeing mindful to “do what you say” and, above all, making sure your campaign is inclusive and sensitive to the history of struggle behind Pride, will help you create a win-win for all with your marketing efforts this month and beyond.

It’s been truly inspiring to see the creative ways cannabis brands have partnered with organizations supporting the queer community for Pride, even more exciting witnessing the long-term commitments to social justice and equality initiatives. From brands offering a percentage of proceeds to LGBTQIA+ causes like Dosist and Lowell Herb Co, to Jetty’s efforts to save cannabis compassion programs, Cannabis for Good, Vangst’s Social Equity initiative focusing on equity in hiring, and finally, to  the PAX ‘Be a Force for Good’ campaign—creative companies are using their platforms for a good cause, connecting with their communities, and creating a buzz around their brand at the same time. Talk about a WIN-WIN!

Pride-Lowells

In the spirit of Pride, below are a few ideas to help your cannabis business support social justice issues like Pride. These lists are a start, but you’ll want to seek out local organizations as well that align well with your brand values and mission.

Let us know what you’re doing to support Pride! What other organizations or community efforts are you spearheading? Please share in the comments!

LGBTQIA+ Organizations to Support

Pride month is almost over, but it’s never too late to partner with and donate to organizations doing great work in support of the queer community. Here’s just a sampling of our favorites, many in our own backyard.

Equality as a Business Culture

Your Pride marketing efforts should be genuine. Your audience can tell if you’re inauthentic, so be sure those stunning images and cleverly crafted words are backed by a solid action plan to promote diversity and equity within the walls of your organization.

Here are some preliminary steps you can take:

  • Hire for diversity and hire those who have been impacted by the war on drugs.
  • Build acceptance of all people into your company culture, and have a ‘zero tolerance for intolerance’ policy in place.
  • Real representation matters: mix up your marketing with images showing the diversity of real people from all walks of life. When people can see themselves represented in your marketing, they feel heard and safe.
  • Collaborate with, purchase from, and be a true ally to LGBTQIA+ owned and focused organizations in your community.
  • Participate in and sponsor Pride Events – here’s a Pride Calendar by City.
  • Carefully moderate your Pride campaigns on social media to make sure any discussion in the comments is supportive and not bigoted or hateful..
  • Think of Pride as an opportunity to educate, engage with, and listen to your audience rather than to toot your own horn.

When planning Pride marketing campaigns, be mindful, let your LGBTQIA+ teammates lead the process, and check out these guides from Later and AdWeek for more excellent tips. Happy Pride!

An Ode to a Decade of Mendocino

Sometimes time passes slowly, and sometimes it flashes by in an instant. And somehow it’s often a strange mix of both. Fleeting but infinite.

When change comes, it sweeps through my life like a tidal wave, knocking everything over, uprooting my best laid plans. It is probably because I so carefully lay those plans, over-analyzing every step, that changes have this affect on me. You think I would learn. But I am, after all, a stubborn Taurus…

Recently I took a chance that set in motion a number of big changes on the horizon. I applied for a full-time position at a creative agency. The sort of place I had always wanted to work, but years of working remotely had spoiled me into stagnation. Maybe the isolation is getting to me. Maybe I’m just getting old. But the time seemed ripe for trading in my freelancer freedom, flexible schedule and nonexistent commute for something different. Something more stable and sustainable.

And just like that, I had a phone interview, followed by an in person one. And as this was a connection through my festival work (once again, thank you Tulku and Enchanted Forest…), I quickly became excited and felt like it was a great fit. Last week I received an offer from The Hybrid Creative in Santa Rosa, who was recently acquired by Kush Bottles, a growing company focused on marketing for the new legal cannabis industry. Instead of getting into an industry as the bubble is bursting, I’m excited to be entering a new frontier, on the come-up, in a space that truly allows for some creativity.

This week as I sort through my storage, let go of what I can, see friends and stop by my favorite spots along the coast along the way, I reflect on what my time here has meant to me. And what it has done to me. I am so excited for the next leg of the journey, but letting go of something I love has never been my strong suit, and change is hard.

Today I stopped at a new stretch of the coastal trail in Fort Bragg, on the Noyo Headlands. I walked to the edge as I often do, I sat down on the rocky earth, and I looked out at the ocean. And then, I wrote this…

Now that I know we will be parting soon, Mendo, I have to stop by all my favorite ocean lookouts when I pass by. I only wish I had done it more…

This place is something truly special, a gem of a tiny community I fell in love with instantly and have spent my hardest but most rewarding years. The rugged Pacific laps the rocky edge of the west coast as I reflect on the journey that brought me here and the one that lies ahead.

Luckily I am not going far, but for the first time in my life I am moving somewhere that is entirely based on only my own choices and desires; I am embracing this change of my own creation and running towards my fears. It is both exhilarating and melancholy…

I first came here with someone who had been here before and very much drove our decision to move here. And while everything else about that relationship was toxic and hurt me in ways I am still struggling to understand, I am so grateful that it brought me here. Mendocino, you have nurtured me through the hardest heartbreaks I have ever lived through. The redwoods have stood tall by my side and the community has been there for me when no one else was. The people I have met here have shaped and shown me who I am. The friends I have made are for life. The healing this place and these people have brought me has literally saved my life and taught me more than any other education I have had.

I have never been more excited to start a new chapter even though it terrifies me a bit that it is all on my own and was a fairly sudden decision. I will miss being able to pull off the highway to a beautiful ocean view at random, being seeped in the deepest silence of nature, and feeling truly alone yet supported and whole. The Mendocino coast is a bit hard to get to, and being behind the redwood curtain is isolating. Luckily I really needed the alone time. And now I am craving change. And a bit more diversity and culture. And inspired by those around me and what is to come, I bid farewell to the place and people who have been my home the past ten years.

Thank you, Mendo friendos. You know who you are. You lifted me up when my heart and my world were shattered, twice. You held me as I shifted careers, made difficult decisions, and explored new waters. Thank you Mendocino. No matter where I travel, nothing compares to driving around that last curve before the ocean view opens up or speeding through the towering redwoods with the windows down and the music blasting… hitting the county line and sighing “home.” This place has changed me, carried me through so much pain and growth, and reflected my own magic back to me when I couldn’t see it on my own.

The people here are something else. It’s a bit of a weird mix, and it takes a certain weirdness and tenacity to survive out here. It’s a bit hard to believe this place is even in California. It feels like another planet sometimes. But the people. Wow. You are so inspiring, creative, imaginative and FUN AS HELL. Especially the women. I love Mendo men too of course, but the female friendships I have made here are just what I have needed. You ladies taught me the true strength and resiliency of the feminine. I seemed to be closer to my guy friends growing up, but the women I have met in Mendo have helped me grow in ways I never knew I could. The entire community’s steadfast support, help and reflection has helped me learn to love and heal myself. The friends I have met here have believed in me when I didn’t even believe in myself. Thank you.

Thank you for the memories, the trips to Usal, the BBQs and dinner parties, the music and dancing. Thank you for the sunshine and the fog, the amazing climate and the rich soils that have helped me find my green thumb and fed me. Thank you for the learning, the medicine and magic, the growth, the conversations and adventures. Thank you ocean waves who drowned out my tears and the friends who stood by me as I put myself back together again and again. Thank you for the connections, the smiles, the parties, THE FESTIVALS and the sunsets. Thank you for challenging me, and for changing me.

Thank you Mendocino, I am so grateful to have called you home. I’m not sure when exactly it will be, but I know our upcoming goodbye will not be forever. Sonoma, and since it’ll be so close, Bay Area, I’ll see you soon… 🖤🌅🌊

Production Life, Or, Why I Never Update My Blog Anymore…

Taking a Moment to Take it All In - The Grove at EFG 2018

This post I wrote a day or so after returning home from Enchanted Forest, after my most challenging production cycle to date. I have much more to say on this, as my life lately has been consumed by this work. But my sleep deprived ramble does a pretty great job of summing up why I am crazy enough to give up job security and all things normal in pursuit of Lucid Enchantment… 

My heart aches almost as much as my body. My capabilities and strength have been tested and I’m slowly learning to turn the stress into fuel, not to over-invest or overbook myself, to communicate better and to balance with self care and healthier habits. I am not too sure how I stumbled into this realm, but as I look back on the year that has passed since I shifted my career towards freelance event marketing full time, I am grateful. Uncertain, definitely. Scared, every day. But so fulfilled, astounded, inspired and thankful that I get to work with so many inspiring badasses…

Light Portrait of Collaboratorium friends by Harmonic Light

This industry is unstable and my stubborn insistence on truly believing in what I am marketing doesn’t make things any easier. But I get to bring people together for a living. I am barely getting by most months and don’t have investments or savings to show for my hard work, but I have some of the most epic memories and an impressive wristband collection. I have witnessed some amazing shows and experienced the true meaning of community. I have learned SO much about social media, communication, marketing, the music industry, project management, community dynamics, and myself – and yet there is so much more to learn. I have made many many mistakes. I have been challenged in so many ways and I have invested so much emotion and energy and time into this career at only a few years in that I can’t fathom doing anything else, but I also constantly wonder if I’ve truly lost my shit. 🤪

This work is HARD. Every job in event production is hard. It breaks people. It is unsustainable, grueling, chaotic and thankless. And everyone just assumes “you must be raking in the dough since you go to so many festivals.” It is horribly misunderstood. Which is true of every creative field I have worked in but especially in the festival scene. It’s underpaid and often unpaid and yet I continue to sign myself up for this madness. I truly must be insane.

But if I’m crazy, at least I’m surrounded by other weirdos who are creating epic experiences, living their dreams and pulling off some impossibly awesome stuff along the way. The more I festival the less I really party at them. The work is the play for me (plus to market the festival I have to experience it, so lucky me!).

While everyone is buzzing around from stage to stage at night, I often stop in my tracks on my determined walks over the venue grounds and turn around. I stop thinking of what I’m off to do next and I just take it all in. I take a deep breath and I open my eyes to see the amazing visuals on the walls of LED panels and the lasers lighting up the trees and the fog like sky glitter. I hear the crisp perfectly tuned sound flooding my senses and I feel much more than the bass reverberating from that beautiful stack of speakers. The energy of thousands of people celebrating life surrounds me and I literally vibrate. Sometimes it brings tears to my eyes because yes, I am a sap. 😭

There is NOTHING like producer’s high. And though the sleep deprivation and depleted serotonin might be doing most of the talking here, it is in these moments of pausing to take it all in that my heart feels most full and I feel most aligned with my dreams. I may play but a small role in bringing these people together and helping them share their gifts, it may seem really silly to get all sappy and proud that I help throw parties for a living. Especially when most of what I do is very much not a party. But after months of hard work, challenges, learning, herding cats, jumping hurdles, stress, sleepless nights, tears and time, experiencing that moment of pure magic makes it all so worthwhile.

Taking a Moment to Take it All In - The Grove at EFG 2018
Taking a Moment to Take it All In – The Grove at EFG 2018

I spun on my heels to face The Grove stage and the beautiful lights and music, I could see the Flow Zone lit up with friends spinning glowing toys, the light show dancing on the trees overhead, and the sounds of laughter mingling with a dope beat in the air, I thought “we did it. Again. Somehow it all magically fell into place… this really IS an enchanted forest…”

Making magic real is exhausting. But I couldn’t think of anything I would rather do or anyone I’d rather do it with.

What a season so far… Thank you enchanted forest gathering & Lucidity Festivals & FireDrums Fam. I look forward to much more hard work and play to come.